If you follow my ramblings on Twitter (btw, NOT a professional space for me), you know that I’ve been disabled for the past two years, due to a couple of accidents. While I can’t discuss details due to pending legal cases, I can say that things have certainly not gotten any better for me.
Plus, my advisor left the university. Again.
And a major component of the research I was planning is currently being implemented by people with many more resources than I.
Then there was more to the health stuff.
So of course, I’ve recently been having some “come to [insert deity here]” moments as of late. Long story short, I am having to pause and take stock of what really matters most to me. That kinda thing happens when you have an accident, a surgery, and an academic calamity (of some sort) every year for four years… So okay, Universe, I’m listening now. Finally.
Like many PhD students, I have agonized over my journey quite a bit. As I enter my 5th year, still without a research proposal, I have to ask wtf I’m doing with my life. In many ways, I feel like I have ventured so very far from the goals I had when I set out on this journey. Granted, this diversion is not my own doing (that’s all I’ll say about that). However, the recent incidents in my own life and in the lives of people living my professional dream have reminded me of the importance of being true to self.
So what, now? Well, I need to graduate ASAPtually but trying to figure out what this looks like at this stage of my health struggles is a bit difficult. There are at least two or three potential employers interested in my work but I’ve decided to at first get myself healthy so that I can finish strong. Meanwhile, I am mulling over the possibilities. I have a new advisor who might actually be a much better fit for my actual goals and there is a very excited research partner waiting for me on the other side of the globe. Alas, I am still cautious about expressing any tentative plans directly (*cue Hall & Oates*) but I have named some Big Things that I want to keep in the forefront of my mind:
5 things i want in life *help homeless youth change the(ir) world(s) *lotsa darkroom time *warm beaches *world travel *train up changemakers
— YRU BREAKINGMYKAYAK (@AmandaMichelle) October 26, 2015
So, stay tuned. I probably won’t be blogging much but that shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone here.